Roomate troubles

From Todaycollegetour

Hi Dr. Smith. Thanks for letting me see you today. I just really need to talk to someone. I feel like when I tell my friends about my problems, they don’t listen. I am just having a lot of trouble this week in school… well it’s actually been about six months of trouble.
At the begging my sophomore year, I moved into a house with four other girls. I was so excited to be living off campus because I didn’t get along with my freshman roommate in the dorms that well. I was so pumped just to have my own room. I didn’t think anything could go wrong with my new living situation. However, after the first couple of months of living with these girls, I started to feel the after effects.
August, September, and October were amazing. We all got along fine, and their lifestyle of partying and smoking pot was exciting and exhilarating to me. Everything was so new and exciting, and I never seemed to be bored. I thought living the care free life was the life for me. Nothing else seemed to matter excpet doing things that felt good to me at that time. We probably went out four or five times a week, whether we had homework or not. After a few months, I started to realize that my quality of life was not making me happy.
First off, our house is a mess. I don’t even want to cook in our kitchen because of the disgusting counters and stove. I used to do all the cleaning until I realized that none of my other roommates ever helped me. I’m not their mom! I dread coming home because I can’t relax there. Everyone is always so loud and no one gives me my personal space. I shouldn’t have to put up with this, right?
Also, I am doing horrible in school, even though achieving good grades and making highest honors was always something I took pride in, in the past. Going out every night was fun for awhile but not when you see the consequences. I am almost disappointed in myself. I can do so much better. I would be so embarrassed if my parents or friends back home saw what I was doing. How am I going to go anywhere in life like this? I am not going to be able to be a doctor. There is a point where you cant make up for some of the things you have done.
Also, going out so much makes me tired all the time, and it doesn’t help that I can’t sleep well at night because I can always hear my roommate and her boyfriend having sex. I’m too tired to do homework, I’m too tired to hang out with my boyfriend, and I’m too tired to work out, which is something I used to love to do. Along with getting good grades, working out always made me feel better about myself. It was something I did for me and just me. I was doing something productive and something that was good for my health. But I can’t just stop going because I would feel like I was letting down my roommates. They would give me a hard time and wouldn’t let me live it down. And who wants to be the loner at home by themselves? It is so hard not to give in to pure pressure when you have three girls constantly urging you to do something.
Everything is so disorganized in my life. This is not what I wanted out of my college experience. My goals have seemed to vanish. I am always so drunk that I won’t even remember the good times. I have blacked out three times in the last two weeks. I thought that was normal until I talked to my cousin about it. And even though I go out with my roommates all the time, they are not what I consider friends. They would never stand up for me, they rarely watch out for me, and they are definitely not people I look up to. The other day I asked one of my roomates for relationship advice (I have no idea why I would ask her). Me and my boyfriend were in a fight becasue he had not called me for two days. My roomate told me to just sleep with someone else to make him mad. I felt sick to my stomach when she said this. These are the types of people I am surrounding myself with. Have I become like this?

I feel like I have lacked in other important relationships in my life due to my self-centered lifestyle. I am not even a mirror image of who I used to be. I dont even look like what I used to.... I look.....hardened. I hardly talk to my mom and dad anymore. I feel like I have no one....I just feel like I am heading down the wrong path and I don’t know how to stop. What should I do? Can I do anything? Is it too late to change my ways?  ....your right.... I need to move out of my house.